SM v/s PurAbhi

This with reference to the weird dancing[FACES'10] conducted on Saturday whose video I have posted today [27th September 2010..day of insanity/fresentation/fofo/wt'f'....]

Here it goes ...

SM:

wht was d event2day ??
10:05pm

Me:

singing i think

hindi solo
10:05pm

SM:

hw wasif & chini r dancing ?
10:05pm

Me

wot?
10:07pm

SM:

hav u saw d vedio of wasif & chini dancin on komdi padali ?
10:07pm

Me:

hav i saw wot ?
10:08pm

SM:

tht was d part of event ? or they r doing timepass?
10:09pm

Me:

hein ?
10:11pm

SM:

i mean r dey dancin asusual or it was a part of event ?
10:11pm

Me:

...WEIRD DANCING was an event ...

last saturday

obviously i have seen the video ...

i posted it ...
10:12pm

SM:

so it is conducted 2day??
10:12pm

Me

if last saturday was 2day then yes
10:14pm

SM:

anyways who won in weird dancin?
10:14pm

Me

extc people...chin wasif came second
10:14pm

SM:

ok"
...suddenly...SM ...has 'liked' the 'vedios' on my profile

--


elsewhere

SM:

i saw d vedios of dancing who r they those our dancing??
8:14pm

Me
chinmay and wasif
8:15pm

SM:
wht was d event 2day ??
8:15pm

Me
no idea man
how was your project presentation
8:16pm

SM:
we goy repeat &urs ?
8:18pm

SM:
we got reapt presentation on monday
hu was urs ??
8:18pm

Me
repeat?
today is monday
8:19pm

SM:
yes
kott or fofo ne wat laga di
next monday yaar
8:20pm

Me
aur kis kisko repeat mila
8:21pm

SM:
no idea yaar
we left after our presenyation

faq's and some fsa///

These are more or less some of the frequently asked questions and some frequently said answers ...in engineering ..and maybe elsewhere also ...

-homework kya hai ?

(if not this then)

-homework tha kya ?

(else for the knowledgeable few)

-abey yeh sum nahi karne ka tha ...(inspite of him not even starting it )

-(for the deeply inspired or the many threatened)abey chal chalu karte hai ....

-(always followed by)aabey journal sheet de ne!

-(some are always unprepared)chal chal ,pen ,pencil,eraser,scale,answers sab de de....

-(for the seekers of knowledge)arey a scholty bata naa ye sum kya hai ?

-(for the cryptologist)abey yeh word/sentence/homework kya hai ...

-(personal fav)chod na ...kya tp karra ...jo word samaj meim nahi aa raha hai uska diagram nikal...

(when lecture has begun...)

(prof is asking people if they have done the homework)

(to the brave..sometimes stupid who raise their hands for not doing it )

prof-

-what happened ,why homework not done eh ?

-what no reference book ..what library is for ?(student mutters:for books u dolt not for students)

(for students who inspire some promise in sir)

-sir we tried the sum but....

prof:

-eh what?..."we tried..."you are into RnD now?

-how both made same mistakes?(student:sir we were confirming answers ..and both had same steps,same variables...hence...same answer...)

(never tried this out...)

(when student has drawn diagram with pen..and done it freehand \m/)

sir:eh what this!no pencil no scale?

(student:umm...sir question meim ..acceleration aur velocity poocha hai ...)

sir :why absent ?

student:ummm not well sir...

sir:what not well ?

student :ummm fever sir..

sir:what fever?

student:(@#%!@$^)aids sir...

sir:(not paying attention...)what aids huh?

Just observe the happiness on the faces of the people leaving the class..........

That's how we do it II !

The body's metabolic rate decreases during sleep thus reducing the rate of breathing. So the amount of O2 consumed and CO2 exhaled is less, which means less greenhouse gases and a cleaner environment.
We, the students of Mech 5 urge you all to try out this simple technique demonstrated above, and do your bit to fight global warming.

kya bolega abhi....

SOME KOOL THOUGHTS IN FORM OF SHORT STORIES AND LETTERS.................

1)

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where
a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the
entrance is a description of how the store operates.
You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!
There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the
shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch .... You may
choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a
floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.
On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.
The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.
The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are
extremely good looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to
the fourth floor and sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-
dead good looking and help with the housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' Still, she
goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-
dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic
streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the
sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012,890 to this floor. There are no men
on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are
impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

2)

A desperate woman writes to the Technical support Guy,

> Dear Tech Support ,

>

> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .

>

> In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as

> Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1 .

>

> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2. 6 simply crashes the system.

>

> Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

>

> What can I do?

>

> Signed,

>

> Desperate Woman

> ************ ********* ********* ******

>

> DEAR DESPERATE Madam,

>

> First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

>

> Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme. html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

> If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

>

> However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 , Pornography 7.0 or Beer 6.1 .

>

> Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law

> 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize

> control of all your system resources.)

>

> In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program . These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .

>

> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

> You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.

> We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Hot Looks 7.7.

>

> Good Luck

> For more details contact to,

> Technical support Guy



3)

Three dreams of a man:
To be as handsome as his mother thinks.
To be as rich as his child believes.
To have as many women as his wife suspects

---------------------------------------------------------------

Husband and wife are like liver and kidney.
Husband is the liver and the wife is the kidney.
If the liver fails, the kidney fails.
If the kidney fails ..........
the liver manages with other kidney !!
---------------------------------------------------------------

------------------
What's the difference between
Drug and Wine ?
Drug is like a girlfriend that comes
with an expiry date.
Wine is like a wife,
The older it gets, longer the chatter !

------------------------------------------------------------
The Japanese have produced a camera
that has such .. such a fast shutter speed that............

it is capable of taking a picture of a woman
with her mouth shut!!!

AND FINALLY ...........................







Generation Next Motto:
Neither will I marry
Nor will I allow my children to marry !!

Where is Chulk Norris?

Location : Chulk's table, Placement office, 2nd floor
Status : last minute submission time. Lots of 3rd years around, me the only 2nd yr.
Chulk is in the process of checking the many journals lying on his table.

Chulk( 'l' silent) : OK, all of you, come here and stand in a line.Arey wahan kahan jaa rahe ho, idhar aao.
Come here.( licks fingers and starts turning pages of the journal in hand)

(still doing the same...)

Chulk : arey arey, kai re hey?( glances on cover)kaun hai ye?Shankar. eh Shankar kidhar hai re? usko bulao zara idhar!

Shankar! Shankar!
(They take 2 minutes to locate shankar who's in the same room, then 2 more fore him to realize he's been called. Finally at chulk's table)

Shankar : Yes si-

Chulk : Idhar aao re. Ye dekho.(turns the page so that he can't actually dekho)See this. This diagram. Iska kidhar likha hai? Next page pe. What is this?

Shankar : Sir I did all the diagrams together and then-

Chulk : Arey aisa nahin chalega. This will not do. Ye diagram ke baaju mein aana chahiye.

Shankar : Sir yes sir-

Chulk : Arey whay you people are doing? Kitni baar bataneka aap logoko ki aisa mat likh karke? This is the way we have taught you? Right now you don't have viva. But external aayega toh what they will think... such a reputed institute and like this is happening...

***

( Chulk just finished handing out last week's test papers to batch 2. The girls always get at least 8/10 while those who actually understand the subject never get more than 7. One wonders why...)

Chulk : That you don't say. You have no right to ask me why you got these many marks and why he got more that many marks.

One look at the girls' journals tells you what Chulk was so uncomfortable to disclose - boxes around all the diagrams, pearly round handwriting with perfect presentation and spacing, complete answers gulped and puked word-to-word and spelling mistake-to-spelling mistake from Techmax.

We have just thing to say to this guy-Chulk you!